Writer and first-time director Bryan Bertino wastes his taut, tense premise -- two lovers, three villains, one house -- by depending on wearingly familiar tricks.. Piranha 3D is more funny than disgusting, even when screen fills with half-nude swimmers, bobbing like human dumplings in a roiling vat of borscht. This isn't just sick, it's clas-sick!. If you're looking for signs of intelligent life -- well, did you really expect to find them in a remake of a Seventies B-movie anyway?. Music perfect...
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